Moments
By John Walsh
Einstein, as well as other scientists, have given us the wonderful
insight that time isn't as fixed as we might have believed. It
can, in fact, speed up and slow down, sometimes at perplexingly
the most inopportune moments.
One of those eternal moments happened
for me at a Subway sandwich shop. There I was, ordering my hero
with my seven year-old
son Michael, who stutters. When it was Michael's turn to order,
the counterman turned to Michael and asked which of the array
of toppings he would like on his salami hero. And that's when
time morphed into its slow, agonizing dance; as the stranger's
impatient stare meets your child's uneasy approach to making his
wishes known. That's the moment when you, as the parent, knows,
there are two roads to travel here. One is a smooth sail out of
the situation by responding for him. The other is the thorny trip
through the moment, not knowing how long your child might take
in responding.
As the counterman's stare turned to me for relief,
the right thing jumped out of my mouth. Instead of answering for
Michael, I turned to Michael and asked, "So, Michael, what
is it you want on that hero?' This shifted the responsibility
of answering to Michael, empowering him with the knowledge that
his Dad knew he could do it. It also sent a message to the counterman
that I was going to wait for Michael, and that he best do the
same.
Our confidence in our children goes a long way in empowering
them to be self-sufficient, regardless of physical limitations.
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